Facade

I feel a lot of pressure to act a certain way as an atheist. Since Christians are constantly insinuating that the only reason we don't have faith is because we are depressed, rebellious, or angry, I feel this huge obligation to prove them wrong, and act as if life since awareness has been a breeze.

In all honesty, life has been harder.

When I was a Christian I had these illusions that I could pray to somebody and it would make everything better. I knew that if this world sucked, I was promised a better one. I actually didn't give death much thought, perhaps because I was so young.

Now that I know that life is all we have, it makes me incredibly worried that I am wasting it worrying! Here I am, telling a Christian that life is more sacred to an atheist because it is our only shot, and yet I am wasting it sitting and typing on a computer, getting into arguments with complete strangers. And yet, when I try to imagine what I should be doing in order to get the most out of my life, I can't really come up with any answers.

I have been very active lately in learning about the debate between religion and atheism, and I have been absorbing information and news. All this does is make me incredibly depressed because I know that the majority of the world clings to delusion, and that the day I die, it will be much the same.

So what can we do to make a difference? To make the most out of our one shot at life? The Friendly Atheist has suggested that we should donate to important causes, such as science education. I think this is an excellent idea. But how much difference is my tiny contribution going to make?

I think the best some of us can do in this life is to try to enjoy it. I want to smile more often, laugh at stupid jokes, love somebody and be loved. Even if it wont change the world, maybe it will leave an impression on the people around me.